(no subject)

I was cleaning up my room tonight, and I found something that I had written about 3 months after the accident I was in. My comments from today are in [].


September 21, 1998.

I've decided to try to keep a journal, starting with my memories from June 8th, 1998 the first day of the outdoor school trip I went on called "OPALS". I'll put in as much detail as I can remember, and I'm hoping it will be accurate with exactly what happened starting June 8th, 1998.

On June 8th, I was up at about 6:00 am. Dad needed to go to his office for some reason, and after that, he dropped me off at the school. On our way down Falshire, I remember seeing Jen and Debbie carrying Jen's huge black duffel bag. When I got into the school, I put my stuff down, adjusted my sunglasses (they were breaking) and went to find Jen. I saw her walk in the door, her mom behind her. We goofed off for a while until Mr. Fleury came from center A, and told us to put our stuff outside. When we got outside, Jen and I were sitting against the wall. She was talking to the seagulls [We were in grade 8, and she was pretty weird] and I was talking to Mr. Fleury. He was going on and on about how glad he was that Jen and I were on the camping trip. When the bus showed up an hour late at 9:30, we loaded our stuff at the back, and then we claimed our seats. I was sitting stretched out on the seat, Bruce was in the seat across the aisle from me and Jen was in the seat behind him. I can't remember who Bruce was sitting beside. We were listening to Power 107, and everyone was singing. I remember hearing "Where's the love" by Hanson, and "I'll be there for you" by the Moffatts. When we finally got there, we were dropped off by a bunch of canoes by a building called OT. It stood for "Out Tripping Centre". We unloaded our stuff and carried it out of the bus and down a hill, and sat with it at a place called Deer Lodge. We were told the rules- No Smoking and other things that don't really apply to me. Then we met the counselors.

There was Brenda, and I think she was in charge of the thing. There was Jenn [I will add an extra "n" to her name, to clarify against my friend Jen] the leader of my group, Amy, the counselor of my teepee,, Dave, and [I left a blank, hoping I'd remember the other guys' name]. After, we played some of those get to know you games, and then go into our teepee groups. We went and claimed our beds, sort of unpacked, as much as you can when you're in a teepee. Then we were led down the path to where we ate our meals. After a lunch of macaroni, we walked down an icky path of mud and horse prints to the group challenge course, and started the event where you push the tire off of a high pole. Then we went to a rope one, and we couldn't do that one, so we moved to the spider web one that I had done in grade 6, and after that we went to play basketball.

Then, Mr. Fleury suggested going tot he trampoline where people had bum slap contests (I didn't go, there was a deep pit under it). After, we went back to the teepees, and then to supper where we had pizza. Then, Mr. Watson came to the camp, and we went to the high ropes course. Jenn gave us our helmets, and our harnesses. Jen commented that there was no way that a human would design a harness that uncomfortable. We were shown how to tie and fasten them. Then we were off. I climbed the rope ladder, then came down. Mr. Watson got me to try again, and I did the same thing. Then Jen wanted a turn. She climbed all of three steps, then came down. Mr. Fleury came around and asked if we were okay with not going up to an element [what was meant was an activity 10 or so feet off the ground]. We said we were, and then he went to the pamper pole [25ish foot tall pole that kids climb, then jump to a trapeze that is 8ish feet away] and lots of kids climbed it. Then we went back to Deer Lodge and had a snack. We went inside, and talked about the best things that had happened that day. I mentioned about people talking to people that they normally didn't talk to. Then Fleury told us he was moving to a different part of the school, and wouldn't teach us next year. and then we were told we could go to bed or stay in the lodge and play cards or something. I went back to the teepee with Jen, then I went back to the Lodge. Brenda came, kicked us out, and we went to bed.

On June 8th, Amy woke us up. I had a headache and a stomach ache because of the smoke that was in the teepee. We dressed, then washed up. Jen was being slow, and I was trying to get her to hurry up. We got there, some people ate, then our group was off for the horseback ride. When we got to the stables, we met the guy who took us on the trip. He assigned us horses, and gave us hoof picks, and brushes and taught us what to do. After our horses had a number, so we went and got the bridles and saddles, put them on, and went riding. We stopped, and then tied our horses, and had lunch. We got back on, rode back, put our horses back, then went to our teepees. After, we went for dinner, then we went to OT. Some people went with Jenn to pack food and others, including me and Jen went with Mr. Fleury to help pack group things like extra foamies, toilet paper, etc. After, he took us outside, and we learned how to light the white gas stove, and then we walked down to the lake for our flat water prep. On a chalkboard, Jenn showed us how to eddy on a river, and name the strokes that we'd use. We got life jackets and paddles, and sat on the dock. We practiced our strokes on the dock with paddles in the water, then we got into our canoes. We practiced what we learned on the lake. Jenn pulled us our of the lake, an we went back to Deer Lodge, where we sat and talked again about our favorite things. Then we were cut loose, so I showered, then went back to the lodge and read. Brenda kicked us out early, and the fire was just starting in the teepee, so I had to stay out until the smoke cleared. I wasn't feeling well, and I guess you could tell because Mr. Fleury came and asked what was wrong. I said I was just cold, because if I was sick, I wouldn't be allowed to go canoeing. He said goodnight, and to have fun tomorrow, so then I to the teepee which had most of the smoke gone, so I went to bed.

June 10th, 1998. Not my favorite Day. Amy woke Jen and I up early so we could pack for our trip. [We had to sleep away from our activity groups, as there were 8 beds in a teepee, but 10 in our activity groups] I wrestled my sleeping bag and stuff, then jen and I took our stuff up to OT, then we were late for breakfast. I didn't feel well still, so I ate just a little. Then we went to OT, packed the canoes, then went to the low ropes course. We packed the rest of our stuff afterwards, then we left. In the van, I was sitting between a Grumpy Jen, and a canoe counselor called Blair. We forgot stuff, so we drove back and then left again. After we got to where we were to launch the boats from, we had bagel sandwiches, then reviewed our strokes, then we launched our boats, and were off.

I remember it being beautiful along the way. I saw a train and wanted to take a picture [Note, I am obsessed with the CP rail trains, to this day. I think they're beautiful] A long while later, we eddied, and were told that the river was going to be a bit faster along the next little bit. They asked if we were comfortable, and we all said yes. The next little bit is somewhat a blur in my mind, but I remember seeing the signal to get off the river, and seconds later, being pushed into the bushy part of the river, and trying to stabilize the boat. All of a sudden, I was in the water thinking "I can't swim, I'm going to die." I was struggling against the water, but I remembered to stop, and be calm. I remembered the emergency training we had, and so I put my hands up. They came out of the water, I felt air, so I kicked my legs, and brought myself to the surface, and grabbed a log. I then started to yell because I didn't know how far I had drifted underwater. I remembered to stay awake, and to keep my head up. I kept yelling. I heard a voice then was told to keep my head up. I remembered from the training that I needed to keep my feet in front of me so I wouldn't get pulled under by the currents. I heard bits of the conversations "She's under" and "Set it up" and other things. Then Jenn came and grabbed my life jacket and helped me get out of the water onto the logs. I remember she had cut her finger. then things are blurry, but I remember Jen laying across the logs. Blair and Bryce [Bryce was a student, also very traumatized by this whole thing. He's a great guy, and I don’t' get to talk to him much] were doing CPR on Jen and they did it for a very long time. Bryce was pumping, and Blair was breathing for her. After, the ambulance and paramedic came. [We were on the logs for over 90 mins] they took Jen away, got Blair an Bryce out of there, then three men came and helped me off the logs. They took me to where a motorboat could dock, then we went to the other side of the river, picked up Cole and Jessica [Their canoes also hit the logs, but they didn't capsize]. We went to a van where they did our vial signs, then we went into the camp van, and everyone who was on the canoe trip was in there. I was in the middle row with Jenn. I remember saying "Thank you for saving my life" and I remember her reply "Thank you for being okay."

We were then told the plan- to go to a building on the camp, to sleep and to wait. We got back, and Jessica and I were brought to the washroom where I could borrow some dry clothes and shoes, and to calm down, as Jessica was hysterical. [I was surprisingly calm]. I told Jessica that everything would be okay in the morning. [I remember now that she was talking about how nice Jen had been to her the day she forgot her lunch, and Jen gave her money to buy something]. After she was calm, and I was changed, we went to meet with the group who was eating dinner. I sat beside a counselor, and Adam. Adam asked if I wanted some soup or a sandwich, and I said no. He talked me into eating some crackers though. After everyone finished eating, they went to play games or to talk, but I just sat there. They took us to a TV and played Austin Powers. I fell asleep. I remember waking up to pee, and i saw Mrs. Alisat and Mrs. Goodrich. I went back to sleep.

The next thing I remember is seeing Mr. Fleury there. Kris woke me up, and made me sit up. There were people in the room that I didn’t know. Mr. Fleury began to talk, he said that everything was done, but that Jen had died. Mom showed up, and we were all silent. Finally a counselor looked towards me, and asked if I had expected this. I said no. Mrs. Alisat talked about how she had lost a friend when she was young, Then people went to get their stuff. I sat on the floor in front of the doors, and was leaning against something. Mom was beside me, and Mr. Fleury sat beside me. Him, mom and I talked for 15 minutes, then someone said to get a sleeping bag and we went to another building to sleep.

I didn't sleep much that night. My mom was the only one to come out that night, and she spent the night. In the morning, they took us to deer lodge, where the rest of the kids on the trip that didn't go canoeing were. They were all told, and we were re-told that Jen had died. After we were given time for it to sink in, we rounded up our stuff 2 days early. I gave mine to mom so she could take it back, but I wanted to be with my peers on the ride back. The rest of the kids were loading their stuff on the top of the vans, but I stood there with nothing to do. Mr. Fleury came to me and asked how I was going. I started to cry, and we talked for a little while then we got into the vans.

[I left out a huge part here. We left in three vans, and when we pulled out, the media followed us THE ENTIRE WAY back to Calgary. It was SO bad. The original plan was to drop us off at the community centre by our school, but the media had gathered there, so we were diverted to a nearby elementary school.]

When we got to Falconridge school, mom, Amanda, Kara, and Margaret (Amanda's mom) were there. My mom had picked them up at Terry Fox. Amanda hugged me so hard, I almost fell over, then we went back to the deserted Junior High. I saw some people, then we went to my house, and into my room. Amanda and Kara wanted to know the whole story, so I told it to them. Kara had to leave, then we called our other friend Kristin's house. Her mom said Kristin didn't know (she went to high school) and so Amanda and I went over there to be with her when her mom told her. The rest is blurry until after supper. Me, Amanda, Jason , Kristin, Amber, Andrew, Dave, Kelley, Danielle, Kristy, Fiona, Ashley, and April all went over to Kevin and Debbie’s place [These are Jen's parents] and we visited. Amanda came and slept over that night.


So, that's my full story.